Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
