I hate your face
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.