She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
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