Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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