Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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