my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
