At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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