We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long