She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
