At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
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