5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize
