This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
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