Who wears a wallet chain?!
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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