So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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