I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize