she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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