then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
