Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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