Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
