watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize