Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
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