You're so nebulous sometimes
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
