Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Randomize
