lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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