If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize