i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
This toilet bowl is my home.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
