I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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