in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
