If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
