i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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