You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize