He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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