it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Randomize
