Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize