i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
pop tarts are not kleenex
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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