did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
My ATM looks so different sober.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
