Dual....:-)
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
