Three words: puerto rican gang bang
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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