I got chris browned last night
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
