Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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