NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
