We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
