Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize