dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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