she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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