I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
