Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"

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(248): View more from Michigan

The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking

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(915): View more from Texas

like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on

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(917): View more from New York City

Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.

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(519): View more from Ontario

There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge

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(207): View more from Maine

I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.

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(563): View more from Iowa

I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes

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(203): View more from Connecticut

sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?

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