ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
