Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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