You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
