And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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