she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
